It's already Friday.
I feel as though this week (this very challenging and busy week) has had its way with me.
Honestly, as this morning rolls in, I feel beaten up and run down.
But now that Friday is here, I am excited to enjoy the much-needed weekend, I realize that this week was the first week of 2011 where my life seemed truly unmanageable... overwhelming, if you will. So this morning, I stopped everything and started praying for the Lord to show me what was going on... why life seemed so hectic all of a sudden. Here is what He revealed:
Turns out that this week I allowed my own "busyness" to bulldoze over God's healthy promise of calm, comfort and control in my heart. Sadly, at some point I stopped focusing on Jesus with regard to my schedule... I stopped looking to my Creator to give me just enough time and energy to finish the work He planned for me to accomplish. As a result, I stopped focusing my gaze on the Master of all my comings and goings. Instead, I obsessively propelled my life into more and more busywork as I pridefully embraced the far fetched notion that I could handle it all... that I could complete a never ending to do list in five days or less. How ridiculous.
Have you ever had a week like that?... A time when you were distracted away from your purpose to live deliberately under Jesus' authority, and instead became a responsibility addict... a delusional workaholic who lived hurried and scattered? And unfortunately, the deeper you tried to get things done, the more your heart and spirit started running on auto pilot? Have you found yourself sitting at the end of a time period wondering how you got there?... Realizing how many meals you skipped or scarfed down, how much sleep you lost, and how frequently you worked late rather than working smart - all for the sake of self fulfillment and accomplishment?
This was such a week for me. A week where Satan was able to cloud my judgement with stacks of responsibilities and people pleasing. And I bit down hard on the enemy's bait. So hard, that I've been struggling to wiggle free from his net since Monday. Even though I had enjoyed my daily study and prayer time this week, in retrospect, I don't think I showed up 100% for God. No. I was more like the spouse who takes his partner out for an intimate dinner but ends up discussing business on his cell phone throughout the entire evening. SOOO, not cool!!!
Thankfully, today the Lord came to my rescue. He dusted away my fog of frenzy and exposed how self destructive I had become in only five short days. With busyness monopolizing my time, I lost sight of the fact that He should be the only one overseeing my productiveness. How embarrassing. I knew that. I strive to live by it. Yet in one small work week, my sinful ego began to overshadow my Redeemer's rule, and I started grabbing it all back... all the work and worry... all the intense rushing and pushing to get EVERYTHING done now. How grateful I am to realize how much I need to let go and give back to Him in order to stay on track and enjoy His peace and rule over all that is going on around me and in me.
So, as the weekend soon approaches, I look forward to sacred renewal and a time of restful submission as I pause to snuggle back into the arms of my Good Shepherd. Thank you, Lord, for coming after me when I fall astray. Thank you for opening my eyes to the dangers of burnout and busyness. Thank you for protecting me and my time even when I foolishly abuse the moments you have given. Keep my eyes focused on You, dear Jesus. Keep me committed to Your plan and not on my own objectives. Direct my steps and prevent me from over-prioritizing my days with hectic and superficial tasks. Remind me to stop, pause, breath and be silent as I seek to trust Your timing. Continue to give me exactly what I need, to accomplish exactly what You have planned for my life.
Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind. (Ecclesiastes 4:6)
Father, let me produce and please You alone. In all I do, may I forever proclaim, "Glory be Your Name, dear Jesus. All glory and power is Yours to rule! O Holy King of Kings!" Amen!!!
Blog Post Written By Victoria Anderson