the selfish monster resurfaces

Chuck and I live in a modest-sized "raised ranch" style home. It works well for us both because the upstairs level contains our living room, dining room, kitchen, bedrooms, etc., and the downstairs is sanctioned as Chuck's "Man Cave" (aka our family entertainment room). I am convinced that all men need a Man Cave. They like to have that special room to hold the biggest TV they can get their hands on. A place where they can play computer games and turn their stereos up to decibels equal to the launch of the space shuttle. It's a place where recliners are standard, remotes are bountiful, and just about everything plugs into the wall.

Although our Man Cave has a lovely fireplace situated in the center of the room, it is unfortunately not the "showpiece" feature seen when company enters. No, people generally miss our sweet family portrait hanging above the fireplace because they are overwhelmed by Chuck's massive "wall-o-television" projecting life-sized images (which let's face it, is kind of freaky). Attached to the television, my engineering husband has connected a DVR-recording thingy, a computer, a Wii gaming system, and who knows what else. On either side of the TV are built-in shelves that hold varying board games and what not. So, as you can imagine, this is the room we entertain most in. It is where we congregate as a family at the end of a long day.

This past week, I asked Chuck if we could rework the positioning of furniture in the Man Cave. I wanted to move the theater chairs a little closer to the television in order to make room for a treadmill I have been saving for. You see, my doctor wants me to be walking as much as possible while rehabilitating my lower back (which has painfully been a problem for several months now). Without reservation, Chuck started moving heavy pieces of furniture around.... scooting coffee tables here... resituating desks there... sliding floor rugs so that they were centered to my liking, etc. When all was said and done and I was satisfied with the look of the "new" room, we sat down to order the treadmill online.

To place the order, Chuck picked up the lap desk that holds our computer's keyboard/mouse and said, "Do you want to drive, or should I?" I didn't care, so Chuck began surfing the Internet to find the perfect treadmill to suit my needs. As he was typing, he realized that the "feet" of the computer keyboard were not extended out... you know, the feature that allows the keyboard to be raised about 1/2 inch from it's back. Chuck quickly flipped the keyboard feet in the upright position and started Googling "treadmills".

Now, I know everyone has their own preferences when it comes to computers. Everyone has their own favorite keyboard position, mouse speed, etc. But my biggest pet peeve when working on the computer are those stupid extended keyboard feet. If I had my way, they would never be flipped up, much less put on the keyboard to begin with. So, it really bugged me when Chuck flipped them up to elevate the keyboard. So much so, that I just couldn't let it go. Like a crazy person, I kept nagging him to change it back. I kept pushing for it to be setup my way. Did I care that Chuck preferred the keyboard this way? No. Did it matter that he would use it considerably more than I ever would? No. Did I take to heart that my dear husband had just spent the whole afternoon rearranging furniture in his favorite space for my benefit? No. Was I thinking about how Chuck willingly rewired and reworked a complicated setup so that my needs could be accommodated for? No. Instead, I began blowing up the smallest, most insignificant matter. I was thinking only of myself... of my preferences. Simply put, I wanted it my way.

In retrospect, I'm quite amazed at how quickly I can forget all that my husband does for the sake of my benefit. Equally, I'm astounded at how entitled I can act toward the man I love while insisting that he constantly accommodates my every selfish monsterly desire. Do I consider his desires? No. Just mine. What I want. How I think everything should be. Clearly, something isn't healthy or right with this picture. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit brought it to my attention (again) and I later made sure to apologize to Chuck.

So why do I share all this? Well, the same is true in how we can thoughtlessly treat our Savior. We live in a fascinating universe that He created and designed especially for us. Yet, we selfishly and sinfully stomp about forgetting that it is His space, His setup. Our God has the authority to claim ownership of all things. He lovingly oversees and maintains their workings so that we may live well cared for under His headship. He promises to always provide for our every need while fulfilling the desires of our heart according to His will. Still, we regularly forget His love and insist He change His perfect plan to suit our preferences. We bulldoze over His setup, His timing, His design - all for the sake of getting our own way... the same selfish way that separates us from His Light and get us into trouble. Something isn't healthy or right with this picture, ladies. We cannot live holy if we continue to justify that we are more important than God. We cannot demand our way and still expect freedom from our sin. For our ways will always favor sin. Our ways will always prefer what is wrong. Our way is corrupt, tainted, disorderly. But His way is perfect, righteous, eternal.

Today, I encourage you to consider where you have pushed to dominate with your own self-justified authority rather than humbly submit your life over to God's headship. Where are you living your way rather than His way? Where are you rearranging your Holy Husband's plan simply to accommodate the desires of your selfish monster? Is it time to apologize to Him for this sin? Is it time to let the Holy Spirit direct you differently?

This is the day to submit both small and large matters over to the Master, ladies. This is the day to stop thinking only of ourselves and pushing our agenda to control exactly how everything should play out. That's not our role. That's not our concern. God is in control of all things and He alone oversees what is good for us. So instead of questioning His preferences, let's spend our energy noticing all He has provided. Let's thrive in His rich grace and glorify His Name. Let's enjoy His presence while communing together in thanksgiving. Let's love and bask in the happiness and peace that He has designed for us to enjoy and allow Him to redesign our hearts, His temple, into His holy way. As we hear so often in the Christian community, "Let go... and let God!" Simply put, let's just concede to His throne and obey His perfect plan.

Today, let's commit ourselves to the Lord, ladies. Let's submit and be thankful for our God is indeed good! Trust Him and be FREE of the selfish monster. Follow His way and be dazzled!

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. (Psalm 37:4-6)

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22)

Blessed is the man who makes the LORD his trust, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods. (Psalm 40:4)

Blessings!
Blog Posting Written By Victoria Anderson